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Monday, October 24, 2011

And then, when all is said and done...

My dissertation defense is on Friday.

A few months ago, when I first received word that the end of my graduate career was nigh, this week seemed an eternity away. The majority of my dissertation was written, but I had neither an introduction nor a conclusion to my name and the revisions...oh, the revisions! After filling in the gaps, I engaged in an extensive revision process, poring over each chapter, cutting as many as 20 pages from drafts that ran a total of 60-65 pages, and refining my arguments typically at a pace of 4 days per chapter. Maybe there are scholars out there who could go through this process without breaking a sweat, but this was the longest, sustained period of scholarly output in my life...the academic equivalent of a marathon, capping off several years of shorter, though still excruciating, races. True, there was a break in the middle to go to Maine, but only after I had forced my way through more than half of my chapters.

And then it was over...but not really. At the beginning of September, I moved back to the city to start my research fellowship, and although the revisions were complete, there was still more to be done. I had an abstract to write, a bibliography to compile, and graphics to edit. Not to mention all the hassles of moving into a new apartment with a non-functional water heater and blinds that didn't cover the entirety of their respective windows. My first week on the job at my new fellowship was devoted to composing my acknowledgments and printing copies of the dissertation for my committee. (This included persuading the staff at Kinko's that I was the copyright holder of the work being printed...)

And then, for a while, I thought I was finished. The weeks passed, and I got into the swing of things at work. I traveled south to conduct interviews with researchers at a major chemical company. Upon returning home, I brainstormed how I could incorporate what I had learned into a case study and started compiling talks for a pair of conferences in November. But before I could pause and catch my breath, the dissertation rose up like a shark from the deep, sweeping me up once again in its gaping maw. Old Ivy required that I filled out an array of forms and paperwork prior to acknowledging the legitimacy of my defense. In addition, there were questions of logistics---would there be a need for A/V equipment? Disability access? A live webcast? Which room, nay which building, would be the venue for the afternoon's festivities?

And then, last but not least, when all the other paperwork was done, the dissertation had to be formatted for online submission. I eliminated all the figures--it was simpler than obtaining copyright permission letters for all of them--and then readjusted the spacing and margins according to the official guidelines. Another set of revisions followed---the table of contents had to be revised and there were new widows and orphans to correct. And there were questions about online publishing options and how much I would have to pay for the privilege of completing my dissertation.

But at long last, this evening, at 7 PM, I submitted the final set of forms and my thesis was sent off into the aether to await administrative approval from the university's archivists. With the exception of a final form confirming that I survived the oral exam, my dissertation is over.

And now, when all is said and done, I find myself stunned and at a loss for words. How much has changed in these five-plus years? How many friends have I gained and lost? How much have I learned and forgotten? How clear or chaotic does the future seem?

And now, when all is said and done, what will happen next?

For the short term, I don't have to worry about such weighty matters. There is only the defense. The rest of the week will be spent preparing for Friday, devising answers to the questions my dissertation committee might throw at me in front of a seminar room filled with friends and family.

And after that, who knows?

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Tuesday, October 18, 2011

Off the List

A quick update for those of you who remember when this used to be a blog about teaching.
For as long as I taught there, Underwood High School was listed by the school district as persistently dangerous based on the ratio of enrollment and violence reported by the administration and school police. Ms. Oldman, my former principal, used to claim that the outbreaks of fighting in our hallways and classrooms were not especially unique. Other schools had their fair share of assaults, but most chose not to report them. She may well have had a point. It always struck me as odd that a disproportionately high number of the schools on the list were from one city (ours) and that other schools from across the state--even those with similar economic or demographic trends--were somehow absent.

Regardless, all we could do was try our best to keep the peace and work with students and families to reduce violence in the schools.

I'm not sure exactly what's been happening at Underwood these past few years, but I was pleased to read in today's newspaper that it had been removed from the persistently dangerous list. Hopefully this is a sign that things are improving for the students at Underwood. As Ms. Oldman used to say: "KUDOS...Kudos, Kudos, Kudos to the staff and students of Underwood High for this achievement...and remember that you are truly, truly loved."

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Monday, October 10, 2011

It's not perfect...

But as of this afternoon, my dissertation is no longer in my hands. The three-hundred-plus page manuscript has been sent off to the printers and I expect two bound copies to be ready for delivery to the department by the middle of next week.

I feel like someone who hits his thumb with a hammer and then stares at the injury waiting for the pain to register. After all this time, it's hard to believe that it's nearly over. But the calendar doesn't lie. By the end of this month, my time in graduate school will be over and the Invisible Ben will, at long last, be a Ph.D.

What happens after that? Well, I'll keep you posted.

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