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Wednesday, December 22, 2010

The Curse of the Holiday Movie Quote Contest!

Yes, ladies and gentlemen, it's time once again for this blog's annual contribution to winter revelry and seasonal good cheer. Below you will find fifty quotations from fifty films. See how many you can identify. As always, I'll accept answers via e-mail or comments. Get the most and you'll win an Invisible Medal to grace your mantle. Best of luck and happy holidays!

And now...the quiz:

1. “This is my Eiffel Tower. This is my Rachmaninoff's Third. My Pieta. It's completely elegant, it's bafflingly beautiful, and it's capable of reducing the population of any standing structure to zero. I call it 'The Ex-Wife.'”


2. “You are D Squad. D for 'dirtbags.' When I say: ‘Hey, dirtbags!’ that means you! You people are going to hate my guts for the rest of your lives. I am going to make you sorry that you ever came here.”


3. “88 Keys the piano man set you up. Big Boy paid him to get you out of the way.”


4. “Well, sir, I ain't a for-real cowboy. But I am one helluva stud.”


5. “Oh Jerry, don't let's ask for the moon. We have the stars.”

6. “Is there an F-5? What would that be like?”


7. “You'll never find anyone as good for you as I am, to believe in you as much as I do or love you as much!”

"I know that."

“Well then, why?”


8. “As head of security, it is my job to keep you alive. I will not succeed. Not with all of you. If you wish to survive, you need to cultivate a strong, mental attitude. You got to obey the rules. Pandora rules.”


9. “LaBoeuf, if you get crosswise of me you'll think a ton of brick had fell on you! You'll wish you was back at the Alamo with Travis!”


10. “I'll take that, thank you. Professor Marcus, this is another black mark against you. I shall certainly tell the police.”


11. “I wanted to do something outrageous, and it felt really good, to be needed, and to be trusted. It's just there's so much I want to do with this life and it feels that I haven't done any of it. You know, the sand is running out of the hourglass, so I want to look back and say, 'See, I did that, that was me, I was reckless and I was wild, and I fucking did it!'”


12. “So you're worried, not because you'll be in a house full of vampires, but because you think they won't approve of you?”


13. “We poured gasoline all over the place, then left a trail of it out the door. Then lit the whole thing up and watched it burn. But he's dead, Nancy. He can't get you because Mommy killed him. I even took his knives. So it's okay. You can sleep now.”


14. “You know who that is? That's Mr. Evil Knievel. He snuck in my back door, son, when I wasn't lookin'. You better flip-flop back here and gimme a hand, son, or we gonna be in a heap of trouble. Please roger that transmission!”


15. “Neil Patrick Harris stole my car tonight.”

Hey! NPH wouldn't do that, all right? Now let me see some I.D.”


16. “By Grabthar's hammer, by the sons of Worvan, you shall be avenged.”


17. “I don't expect you to understand, you're English, but I'm half Greek and Greek women like Elektra always avenge their loved ones!”


18. “I don't know what they've told you down at the USO, but you're going to be meeting a lot of strange men. Men in uniform. Boys a long way from home. Lonely. Desperate. They really have one thing on their minds. Show 'em a good time.”


19. “Kelp, people just don't like teachers blowing up their kids!”


20. “I was like one of the bad kids in your class. Somebody told me a lie and I believed it. One's as bad as the other.”


21. “We don't have none of this stuff in the boy's room! Wait a minute! We don't got none of this... we don't got doors on the stalls in the boy's room, we don't have, what is this? What's this? We don't have a candy machine in the boy's room!”


22. “We are Sex Bob-Omb and we are here to make you think about death and get sad and stuff!”


23. “It's buried under a big W. Say, what is a big W?”


24. “So, I'm a woman pretending to be a man pretending to be a woman.”


25. “I am the Nightrider. I'm a fuel injected suicide machine. I am the rocker, I am the roller, I am the out-of-controller!”


26. “Ogata, if the oxygen destroyer is used even once, politicians from around the world will see it. Of course, they'll want to use it as a weapon. Bombs versus bombs, missiles versus missiles, and now a new superweapon to throw upon us all! As a scientist...no, as a human being...I can't allow that to happen!”


27. “I want to be alone. I think I have never been so tired in my life.”


28. “In the past year, over 800,000 Americans have died. Despite millions of dollars of research, death continues to be our nation's number one killer.”


29. “Well versed in the natural sciences and mathematics. She speaks seven languages proficiently. Were she not a woman one would consider her to be an intellectual.”


30. “Back home everyone said I didn't have any talent. They might be saying the same thing over here but it sounds better in French.”


31. “It was just my old disappearing pig trick!”


32. “We're not gonna get rid of anybody! We're gonna stick together, just like it used to be! When you side with a man, you stay with him! And if you can't do that, you're like some animal, you're finished! We're finished! All of us!


33. “You can have any kind of a home you want. You can even get stucco. Oh, how you can get stucco.”


34.
Okay, you're used to the top talent. What are you wasting your time working *me* over for?
I like the way you swing a guitar.
Yeah, I guess I *did* get a lot of wrist action into it, didn't I?

35. “Broken Sword said 'The people have suffered years of warfare. Only the King of Qin can stop the chaos by uniting all under Heaven.'”


36. “You'll find a slight squeeze on the hooter an excellent safety precaution, Miss Scrumptious.”


37. “You're waiting for a train. A train that will take you far away. You know where you hope this train will take you, but you don't know for sure. But it doesn't matter, because we'll be together.”


38. “Ma, I've got it! I've got the idea, the angle, the lead. I'll be Jewish! Why, all I've got to do is just say it!”


39. “It has nothing to do with Satan, Mama. It's me. Me. If I concentrate hard enough, I can move things.”


40. “We decided to make it female so it would be more docile and controllable.”

More docile and controllable, eh? You guys don't get out much.”

41. “Mr. Maryk, you may tell the crew for me that there are four ways of doing things aboard my ship: The right way, the wrong way, the Navy way, and my way. They do things my way, and we'll get along.”


42. “We're either in a café in Paris or a coffee shop in New Jersey. I'm pretty sure I just came back from the doctor with life-changing news.”

We do a lot of improv here. Just stay loose, have fun. You'll be fine!”


43. “That ain't no Etch-A-Sketch. This is one doodle that can't be undid, Homeskillet.”


44. “This album is full of pictures of him. Bobby Wheelock and ninety-three other boys are exact genetic duplicates of him, bred entirely from his cells. He allowed me to take half a liter of his blood and a cutting of skin from his ribs.”


45. “Hide a stone among stones and a man among men.”


46. “There is no secret ingredient. It's just you.”


47. “I don't tip because society says I have to. All right, I tip when somebody really deserves a tip. If they put forth an effort, I'll give them something extra. But I mean, this tipping automatically, that's for the birds. As far as I'm concerned they're just doing their job.”


48. “Future generations may well have occasion to ask themselves, 'What were our parents thinking? Why didn't they wake up when they had a chance?' We have to hear that question from them, now.”


49. “One more question. You're watching a stage play. A banquet is in progress. The guests are enjoying an appetizer of raw oysters. The entree consists of boiled dog...


50.
“Hold me closer, Ed, it's getting dark...Tell Auntie Em to let Old Yeller out...Tell Tiny Tim I won't be coming home this Christmas...Tell Scarlett I do give a damn...Pardon me...Thank you! You love me! You really love me!


Comments:
3. Dick Tracy
6. Twister
7. The Way We Were
8. Avatar
11.True Lies
12.Twilight
15.Harold and Kumar Go To White Castle
16.Galaxy Quest
24.Victor/Victoria
33.The Cocoanuts
39.Carrie
47.Reservoir Dogs
 
I think I got 11 of them... but I'll have to wait for the answers to be certain.
 
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