Wednesday, March 29, 2006
Just a Good Ol' Ben
With only a week and a half until spring break and the third marking period grading system opening tomorrow, the fourth marking period mindset has taken hold of both teachers and students at Underwood High School. Students who are passing are already planning their next year's classes. Teachers are beginning to focus less on the current group of students and more on the number of days left until the summer hits. And then there are the kids who failed classes for one, two, or even three marking periods.
Most of them could give a damn whether or not they changed their work habits this late into the game. After all, it is highly unlikely given multiple F's on their report card that they will be able to turn things around before the end of the year. Every so often, I'll hear kids tell me that from now on they're going to really buckle down and get to work. And that lasts typically around a day or two. And then it's back to old tricks.
For one kid today, that lasted about 2 minutes. This is a kid who has spent most of his time in my classroom slacking off and talking to his friends rather than listen to anything I have to say. So today, he decides suddenly to move to the front of the room where another of my students normally sits. With the de facto dissolution of my assigned seating policy however, the slacker student had claimed the seat as his own and they were fighting over it. Rather than make a big deal of the whole affair, I proposed a semi-Solomonic solution whereby both students would give up their claim to the desk and find alternative seating arrangements. (That way neither one feels like the other has been favored.) The other student complied. The slacker did not despite being asked twice over to move his seat. So I told him he would have to come see me after school for a detention to discuss this further.
He was rather annoyed at this, claiming that he really wanted to do better and couldn't hear in his old seat. When I asked him why, if he wanted to do better, he was talking through the entire hour of yesterday's class, he told me he was still doing his work. "Doing work" to my students means copying class notes...not listening so as to understand them. I attempted to explain this to the student...but needless to say, he would have none of it and stated that he would be cutting the detention.
Knowing that my position would only be strengthened if he cut the detention, I said nothing more. Until he decided to chime in at the beginning of the notes that he knew something that he had copied down the day before. Having just been dragged into a rather stupid argument by this kid, I made the rather clumsy mistake of acknowledging his comment verbally rather than just ignoring him. I told him I didn't care if he knew or not.
And then he just got pissed off. Not loudly. But consistently. He just started cussing me out. After a certain point, I started writing the names down. The classic putdowns were there: faggot, dickhead, asshole, etc. There were threats too...how many other teachers out there are told by their students that they are about to smack the shit out of you?
But my favorite one, the icing on the cake, was being called a fuckin' redneck. The sheer absurdity of the concept reiterated two things about this student:
1. He had never met that many actual rednecks.
2. He therefore automatically equated white people with redneck culture.
He also accused me of consistently trying to "play" him and fed into a conspiracy theory started later by another disruptive student that I'm moving the notes on the overhead too quickly so students can not copy them down well in order for them to all fail.
Ultimately, the student showed up for his detention, believe it or not. I read him the list of insults I have just posted here and asked him if I had left any out. He claimed that the smack the shit out of you comment was not directed at me, but acknowledged having said the other things. And then I just tore into him. I commented that even if his motivation was admirable, his decision to defy me in my classroom would not stand. I noted that in choosing to be a petulant brat, he had diminished his social standing in the eyes of myself and his peers by not being the bigger man and doing what had to be done. And I confirmed that not once during the entire period even after having been called all those things...not once did I ever insult him personally, demean his intelligence, or claim he was somehow incapable of succeeding in my class.
And then he said he felt angry and that he wasn't thinking. And I agreed, reminding him of a saying the Invisible Mom used to tell me when I was upset: We can not always control how we feel, but we can control how we act. And I told him that his class was frustrating. And there are times when I would like to smack kids upside the head for their disrespect or throw them out of a classroom or get rid of them like they were employees and I had the opportunity to actually fire them for incompetence. But I can't. Because I'm a teacher and as much as I may hate my students' behavior, I am obligated to do my best to reach every goddamn one of them...even the ones who act like bastards.
And then I let the kid go. I have to call his house tomorrow morning. I doubt anything will come of it. But just in case, I have a new weapon to hold over his head and those of his classmates...the intermural basketball tournament has started and his homeroom won their first game today. It would be a shame if someone were to contact the teachers in charge of that event and disqualify certain players for unsportsmanlike conduct...
I wonder if there is such a thing as a machiavellian redneck. If not, perhaps I shall invent one.
With only a week and a half until spring break and the third marking period grading system opening tomorrow, the fourth marking period mindset has taken hold of both teachers and students at Underwood High School. Students who are passing are already planning their next year's classes. Teachers are beginning to focus less on the current group of students and more on the number of days left until the summer hits. And then there are the kids who failed classes for one, two, or even three marking periods.
Most of them could give a damn whether or not they changed their work habits this late into the game. After all, it is highly unlikely given multiple F's on their report card that they will be able to turn things around before the end of the year. Every so often, I'll hear kids tell me that from now on they're going to really buckle down and get to work. And that lasts typically around a day or two. And then it's back to old tricks.
For one kid today, that lasted about 2 minutes. This is a kid who has spent most of his time in my classroom slacking off and talking to his friends rather than listen to anything I have to say. So today, he decides suddenly to move to the front of the room where another of my students normally sits. With the de facto dissolution of my assigned seating policy however, the slacker student had claimed the seat as his own and they were fighting over it. Rather than make a big deal of the whole affair, I proposed a semi-Solomonic solution whereby both students would give up their claim to the desk and find alternative seating arrangements. (That way neither one feels like the other has been favored.) The other student complied. The slacker did not despite being asked twice over to move his seat. So I told him he would have to come see me after school for a detention to discuss this further.
He was rather annoyed at this, claiming that he really wanted to do better and couldn't hear in his old seat. When I asked him why, if he wanted to do better, he was talking through the entire hour of yesterday's class, he told me he was still doing his work. "Doing work" to my students means copying class notes...not listening so as to understand them. I attempted to explain this to the student...but needless to say, he would have none of it and stated that he would be cutting the detention.
Knowing that my position would only be strengthened if he cut the detention, I said nothing more. Until he decided to chime in at the beginning of the notes that he knew something that he had copied down the day before. Having just been dragged into a rather stupid argument by this kid, I made the rather clumsy mistake of acknowledging his comment verbally rather than just ignoring him. I told him I didn't care if he knew or not.
And then he just got pissed off. Not loudly. But consistently. He just started cussing me out. After a certain point, I started writing the names down. The classic putdowns were there: faggot, dickhead, asshole, etc. There were threats too...how many other teachers out there are told by their students that they are about to smack the shit out of you?
But my favorite one, the icing on the cake, was being called a fuckin' redneck. The sheer absurdity of the concept reiterated two things about this student:
1. He had never met that many actual rednecks.
2. He therefore automatically equated white people with redneck culture.
He also accused me of consistently trying to "play" him and fed into a conspiracy theory started later by another disruptive student that I'm moving the notes on the overhead too quickly so students can not copy them down well in order for them to all fail.
Ultimately, the student showed up for his detention, believe it or not. I read him the list of insults I have just posted here and asked him if I had left any out. He claimed that the smack the shit out of you comment was not directed at me, but acknowledged having said the other things. And then I just tore into him. I commented that even if his motivation was admirable, his decision to defy me in my classroom would not stand. I noted that in choosing to be a petulant brat, he had diminished his social standing in the eyes of myself and his peers by not being the bigger man and doing what had to be done. And I confirmed that not once during the entire period even after having been called all those things...not once did I ever insult him personally, demean his intelligence, or claim he was somehow incapable of succeeding in my class.
And then he said he felt angry and that he wasn't thinking. And I agreed, reminding him of a saying the Invisible Mom used to tell me when I was upset: We can not always control how we feel, but we can control how we act. And I told him that his class was frustrating. And there are times when I would like to smack kids upside the head for their disrespect or throw them out of a classroom or get rid of them like they were employees and I had the opportunity to actually fire them for incompetence. But I can't. Because I'm a teacher and as much as I may hate my students' behavior, I am obligated to do my best to reach every goddamn one of them...even the ones who act like bastards.
And then I let the kid go. I have to call his house tomorrow morning. I doubt anything will come of it. But just in case, I have a new weapon to hold over his head and those of his classmates...the intermural basketball tournament has started and his homeroom won their first game today. It would be a shame if someone were to contact the teachers in charge of that event and disqualify certain players for unsportsmanlike conduct...
I wonder if there is such a thing as a machiavellian redneck. If not, perhaps I shall invent one.
