Saturday, May 21, 2005
The Revenge of The Revenge of the Sith
Loyal readers of the Invisible Ben may have noticed that he has not been blogging as much lately. For many people this is a cause for rejoicing, but for those sadistic few who savor the suffering I chronicle here on this blog, an unannounced hiatus such as this one is downright insufferable. Now that my Internet access has been restored for the foreseeable future however, I can finally pick up where things left off.
The students have gotten increasingly off the wall the past two weeks or so. Many of the freshmen have finally realized that with less than a month left in the school year there is absolutely no way they will pass my class. This lack of effort combined with the relative difficulty of such chemistry concepts as isotopes and electron configuration have led to a general decline in grades in my class. Some kids are eattempting at least a superficial attempt at reform (notably the kid I took to task by swearing a few weeks back), but often this merely masks their underlying foolishness. That same kid I cussed out, for example, despite finally doing his homework, has taken to writing insulting notes about other students and throwing things across the room on the sly.
Then there are the kids who just have never cared from the start. One of these actually raised his fist up at me before first period on Monday. I couldn't believe it. All I asked him was whether or not he had a binder and a pencil. He clearly didn't until a friend of his came out in the hall and slipped him one. When I refused to let him in anyway he raised his fist to make me flinch, which unfortunately I did. But then I stared him right down and told him to go ahead...hit me if that would make him feel better...but that he should think carefully about the consequences. He backed down after that, but continues to be a pain, not only in my class, but in other classes. That student told me once flat out he was only in school to avoid truancy cops. I wonder how many more of my students would say the same.
Anyhow the one bright moment during the past few weeks was attending a midnight showing of Star Wars: Episode III. Yes, I was one of the nerdly masses who attended a premiere screening. The facilitator for my participation in this event was an old friend from high school who actually took the day off from work to watch all five of the other movies and the Cartoon Network Clone Wars series in preparation for the event. I was nowhere near as dedicated, having decided in advance that I would be going in for work the next morning. So one two hour nap and an hour drive into New Jersey later, I was in the front row of a theater full of very nerdy people watching arguably the most anticipated science fiction film of all time.
Was it worth it? Somewhat. In my opinion, the movie did succeed in answering all the big questions. At the same time though, it was loaded with flaws, which I was not allowed to really discuss immediately after the screening because my friends the die-hard fans would accuse me of naysaying. (And how does one respond to such an accusation? "Hey...I'm not naysaying!...Crap.") In any case, allow me to present a quick rundown of the positive and negative aspects of the film and you can make your own decisions.
Warning...here there be Spoilers!
Ten Incredibly Awesome Things About The Revenge of the Sith
1. Ian McDiarmid: This is his movie, plain and simple, and his performance in every scene is a compelling demonstration of supervillainy done right. From the subtle manipulations at the opera house to the lightsaber duels with Yoda and Mace Windu, and his final, ultimate rise to power, Palpatine is in complete control of the situation in this movie, even when he is being held hostage by separtists.
2. THE Duel: You know which one this is. Despite the presence of some robots that looked straight out of the Megaman series, the Obi-wan v. Anakin duel is everything one could ever hope for. Even more powerful than Obi-wan's eventual victory (no spoiler there, right?), is his decision to leave Anakin burning alive on the shores of a lava lake. Which of course answers the question of why Anakin is bald at the end of Return of the Jedi. It lives up to all of our expectations.
3. R2-D2: Kicking ass and taking names since 1977! Our favorite astromech droid has always had good scenes, both in the original and the prequel trilogies. But here he gets to shine as never before. There was one moment when the entire theater was cheering...you'll know it when you see it.
4. Obi-Wan Kenobi v. General Grievous: Ian McDiarmid may give the movie's greatest performances, but the biggest ass-kicker has got to be Obi-Wan Kenobi. And nowhere is this more obvious than in his duel against the 4 armed lightsaber wielding General Grievous. Just to clarify: Grievous--4 lightsabers. Obi-wan--1 light saber. Guess who wins? "How uncivilized" indeed.
5. Order 66: The elimination of the Jedi is handled with a sadness and a brutality that I didn't think Lucas had in him. Considering that the Jedi had been working in close collaboration with the Clone Troopers throughout the movie and that some had even developed into sympathetic characters, their betrayal is all the more poignant. Also worth mention under this section is Anakin's slaughter of the younglings. Holy crap. He wiped them out! All of them!
6. Yoda: Ironically, some of the best acting in the movie comes from everyone's favorite computer generated Jedi Master. You feel more emotion watching him scurry away through the vents following his duel with the Emperor in the Senate chamber than during any of the discussions between Anakin and Padme. Frank Oz really does excellent voice work here.
7. Wookies: I'll admit it. I was worried when If rist heard they would be in the movie. But seeing an army of bowcaster wielding hairballs being led by none other than Master Yoda himself. I'll admit it, I enjoyed the whole sequence.
8. John Williams: I would be remiss if I did not mention that he continues to kick musical ass in this movie. One of the people I saw the film with pointed out that the only consistent thing across all of the trilogies is that John Williams can write a beautiful and effective musical score.
9. The Tantive IV Blockade Runner: An easter egg for all the die-hard nerds. Jimmy Smits' Senator Organa escapes on a ship that seems incredibly familiar. Shouldn't it be on a diplomatic mission? I wonder if its data tapes have been destroyed. And if not, would they show Yoda and Obi-Wan had been there as well?
10. The closing scenes: Darth Vader and the Emperor stand on the bridge of an Imperial Star Destroyer with Governor Tarkin (played by Wayne Pygram---Farscape's Scorpius!) watching the initial construction of the first Death Star. Meanwhile, Jimmy Smits and his wife are playing with newly adopted daughter Leia and Obi-wan has successfully delivered baby Luke to Uncle Owen and Aunt Beru. And the music from the first movie begins to swell up as Owen holds Luke before a very familiar double sunset on Tatooine and....CREDITS. Beautiful.
Ten Annoying, Frustrating, or Downright Bad Things About The Revenge of the Sith
1. The Fall of Anakin: The brutal actions of Darth Vader (post-Jedi Knight, pre-armor suit) are among some of the most intense and emotionally effective of the entire Star Wars saga, but I really had a hard time accepting his embrace of the Dark Side. This is not to say that Lucas had not set up effective motivations and personal tribulations. But the moment of change, following the death of Mace Windu, seemed overly abrupt. One minute, Anakin's this worrying kid torn between his commitment to the principles of the Jedi and his forbidden love for Natalie Portman. The next he's slaughtering Younglings. The turnaround is sudden to say the least.
2. The Ugly No: You may remember this phenomenon from its more famous appearance in The Empire Strikes Back. Remember Luke's expression when he discovered who his real father was? After seeing Episode III you can understand where that whole thing comes from as poor James Earl Jones, in one of the maybe 5 lines he has in this new trilogy, gives us a hilariously ineffective Ugly No. Should have stuck with those Verizon commercials...
3. "No...you're schmoopy!": If by chance you are George Lucas and you are reading this review, repeat after me: "I am a very talented director and cinematographer, but I need help with dialogue. Serious help. If I ever include a romantic subplot in any future movies I will seek immediate outside aid so that dialogue does not devolve into back and forth banter over who loves who more my tragic hero or my female lead."
4. The CGI Lizard: Yeah, I guess the Utapauan (Utapauese? Utapauish?) riding lizard was a neat concept and all, but it was annoyingly fake to look at and downright painful to listen to after more than a minute. In fact, ignore the first part of this complaint...the CGI was handled as well as could be expected...but that damn yipping. Lizards don't yip.
5. "She was... very beautiful. Kind, but sad." : The name of the game is continuity. Specifically, Leia tells Luke in Return of the Jedi that she remembers her real mother. This is accented even more in the official novelization of Episode VI, where Leia actually has brief memory flashes of her mothers' attempts at escape from the Empire. But here, Padme dies mere minutes after the Jedi twins are born. With all the crying and the sudden death, I'm surprised Leia has a chance to even remember her mother's eyes. Oh, and why doesn't Darth Vader recognize either C-3PO or R2-D2? I guess they never really share much screentime, but if they did I think it would be amusing if James Earl Jones asked 3PO if he remembered anything about being built in Mos Espa.
6. Jar-Jar...lives?: Damnit Lucas...we had a deal. You insert the cute, vaguely racist CGI character in Episode I and we accept it as long as he DIES in Episode III. You killed off Mace Windu. You killed off Kit Fisto. You killed off everybody else! But Jar-Jar...lives?!? This deal keeps getting worse all the time.
7. Where's Qui-Gonn?: At the end of the film, the Emperor's taken over and the two surviving Jedi, Obi-Wan and Yoda, are talking about what's going to happen next. And Yoda surprises everyone by telling them how a former colleague has discovered how to become one with the force. Obi-Wan realizes that he is talking about his old master, Qui-Gon Jinn...and that's it. Now if I were running this show, I think that would be a good time for a glowing blue Qui-Gon to show up and provide some sage advice. Wouldn't that be nice? It would tie together this trilogy, provide a little impetus for Obi-Wan t
8. Mon Mothma: M.I.A. : I've now checked this on IMDB, Wikipedia, and every other reliable movie website I know. Mon Mothma, leader of the resistance (did you know she was married? I didn't...), was supposed to make an appearance in this film. Now maybe I blinked, but Genevieve O'Reilly was nowhere to be seen in this film. Nor was the Rebel Alliance outside of Bail Organa. This should have been dealt with.
9. Sifo-dyas...who the hell was he?: Having not read the novels that Lucas and his cronies published covering the time between the films, I may be at somewhat of a disadvantage here. But one thing that was never made clear to me was exactly what the deal was with Jedi master Sifo-Dyas...the guy who ordered the clone army, and how he fit into the Emperor's plans. Also did we ever get true confirmation that the Emperor was named Darth Sidious? Did he once say "My Sith name is Darth Sidious?" Clearly we know it as an audience....but how did Yoda figure it out? I guess he's just that good.
10. This is the end: And yet there are so many questions left unanswered. What is Yoda's species? Was Captain Antilles in this movie related to Wedge? Who is this Tarkin guy and why did the Emperor put him in charge of the Death Star project? These are silly questions to be sure, but there are no more films to tell them in, barring extended footage. I don' tknow...I guess it's just a feeling of letdown from seeing the end of the saga, but all the same, I would gladly have sacrificed a scene or two of pointless romantic dialogue for more nods to the fanbase answering questions like these. But what do I know? For better and for worse, I'm not George Lucas.
Anyhow, my misgivings with the film aside, I got my comeuppance for attending a midnight screening two days later when I slept through all alarms and woke up at 8 AM. Normally I am at school by 7, so this was not a good thing--for the first time in 2 years, I was seriously late for school. In the end I only really missed advisory and the day went reasonably well despite my not having lunch. But all the same, the Sith got their revenge on me and that is why I am going to cut this post short now, gentle readers, so that I may get to bed and avoid repeating my past mistake.
May the Force be you...always.
Loyal readers of the Invisible Ben may have noticed that he has not been blogging as much lately. For many people this is a cause for rejoicing, but for those sadistic few who savor the suffering I chronicle here on this blog, an unannounced hiatus such as this one is downright insufferable. Now that my Internet access has been restored for the foreseeable future however, I can finally pick up where things left off.
The students have gotten increasingly off the wall the past two weeks or so. Many of the freshmen have finally realized that with less than a month left in the school year there is absolutely no way they will pass my class. This lack of effort combined with the relative difficulty of such chemistry concepts as isotopes and electron configuration have led to a general decline in grades in my class. Some kids are eattempting at least a superficial attempt at reform (notably the kid I took to task by swearing a few weeks back), but often this merely masks their underlying foolishness. That same kid I cussed out, for example, despite finally doing his homework, has taken to writing insulting notes about other students and throwing things across the room on the sly.
Then there are the kids who just have never cared from the start. One of these actually raised his fist up at me before first period on Monday. I couldn't believe it. All I asked him was whether or not he had a binder and a pencil. He clearly didn't until a friend of his came out in the hall and slipped him one. When I refused to let him in anyway he raised his fist to make me flinch, which unfortunately I did. But then I stared him right down and told him to go ahead...hit me if that would make him feel better...but that he should think carefully about the consequences. He backed down after that, but continues to be a pain, not only in my class, but in other classes. That student told me once flat out he was only in school to avoid truancy cops. I wonder how many more of my students would say the same.
Anyhow the one bright moment during the past few weeks was attending a midnight showing of Star Wars: Episode III. Yes, I was one of the nerdly masses who attended a premiere screening. The facilitator for my participation in this event was an old friend from high school who actually took the day off from work to watch all five of the other movies and the Cartoon Network Clone Wars series in preparation for the event. I was nowhere near as dedicated, having decided in advance that I would be going in for work the next morning. So one two hour nap and an hour drive into New Jersey later, I was in the front row of a theater full of very nerdy people watching arguably the most anticipated science fiction film of all time.
Was it worth it? Somewhat. In my opinion, the movie did succeed in answering all the big questions. At the same time though, it was loaded with flaws, which I was not allowed to really discuss immediately after the screening because my friends the die-hard fans would accuse me of naysaying. (And how does one respond to such an accusation? "Hey...I'm not naysaying!...Crap.") In any case, allow me to present a quick rundown of the positive and negative aspects of the film and you can make your own decisions.
Warning...here there be Spoilers!
Ten Incredibly Awesome Things About The Revenge of the Sith
1. Ian McDiarmid: This is his movie, plain and simple, and his performance in every scene is a compelling demonstration of supervillainy done right. From the subtle manipulations at the opera house to the lightsaber duels with Yoda and Mace Windu, and his final, ultimate rise to power, Palpatine is in complete control of the situation in this movie, even when he is being held hostage by separtists.
2. THE Duel: You know which one this is. Despite the presence of some robots that looked straight out of the Megaman series, the Obi-wan v. Anakin duel is everything one could ever hope for. Even more powerful than Obi-wan's eventual victory (no spoiler there, right?), is his decision to leave Anakin burning alive on the shores of a lava lake. Which of course answers the question of why Anakin is bald at the end of Return of the Jedi. It lives up to all of our expectations.
3. R2-D2: Kicking ass and taking names since 1977! Our favorite astromech droid has always had good scenes, both in the original and the prequel trilogies. But here he gets to shine as never before. There was one moment when the entire theater was cheering...you'll know it when you see it.
4. Obi-Wan Kenobi v. General Grievous: Ian McDiarmid may give the movie's greatest performances, but the biggest ass-kicker has got to be Obi-Wan Kenobi. And nowhere is this more obvious than in his duel against the 4 armed lightsaber wielding General Grievous. Just to clarify: Grievous--4 lightsabers. Obi-wan--1 light saber. Guess who wins? "How uncivilized" indeed.
5. Order 66: The elimination of the Jedi is handled with a sadness and a brutality that I didn't think Lucas had in him. Considering that the Jedi had been working in close collaboration with the Clone Troopers throughout the movie and that some had even developed into sympathetic characters, their betrayal is all the more poignant. Also worth mention under this section is Anakin's slaughter of the younglings. Holy crap. He wiped them out! All of them!
6. Yoda: Ironically, some of the best acting in the movie comes from everyone's favorite computer generated Jedi Master. You feel more emotion watching him scurry away through the vents following his duel with the Emperor in the Senate chamber than during any of the discussions between Anakin and Padme. Frank Oz really does excellent voice work here.
7. Wookies: I'll admit it. I was worried when If rist heard they would be in the movie. But seeing an army of bowcaster wielding hairballs being led by none other than Master Yoda himself. I'll admit it, I enjoyed the whole sequence.
8. John Williams: I would be remiss if I did not mention that he continues to kick musical ass in this movie. One of the people I saw the film with pointed out that the only consistent thing across all of the trilogies is that John Williams can write a beautiful and effective musical score.
9. The Tantive IV Blockade Runner: An easter egg for all the die-hard nerds. Jimmy Smits' Senator Organa escapes on a ship that seems incredibly familiar. Shouldn't it be on a diplomatic mission? I wonder if its data tapes have been destroyed. And if not, would they show Yoda and Obi-Wan had been there as well?
10. The closing scenes: Darth Vader and the Emperor stand on the bridge of an Imperial Star Destroyer with Governor Tarkin (played by Wayne Pygram---Farscape's Scorpius!) watching the initial construction of the first Death Star. Meanwhile, Jimmy Smits and his wife are playing with newly adopted daughter Leia and Obi-wan has successfully delivered baby Luke to Uncle Owen and Aunt Beru. And the music from the first movie begins to swell up as Owen holds Luke before a very familiar double sunset on Tatooine and....CREDITS. Beautiful.
Ten Annoying, Frustrating, or Downright Bad Things About The Revenge of the Sith
1. The Fall of Anakin: The brutal actions of Darth Vader (post-Jedi Knight, pre-armor suit) are among some of the most intense and emotionally effective of the entire Star Wars saga, but I really had a hard time accepting his embrace of the Dark Side. This is not to say that Lucas had not set up effective motivations and personal tribulations. But the moment of change, following the death of Mace Windu, seemed overly abrupt. One minute, Anakin's this worrying kid torn between his commitment to the principles of the Jedi and his forbidden love for Natalie Portman. The next he's slaughtering Younglings. The turnaround is sudden to say the least.
2. The Ugly No: You may remember this phenomenon from its more famous appearance in The Empire Strikes Back. Remember Luke's expression when he discovered who his real father was? After seeing Episode III you can understand where that whole thing comes from as poor James Earl Jones, in one of the maybe 5 lines he has in this new trilogy, gives us a hilariously ineffective Ugly No. Should have stuck with those Verizon commercials...
3. "No...you're schmoopy!": If by chance you are George Lucas and you are reading this review, repeat after me: "I am a very talented director and cinematographer, but I need help with dialogue. Serious help. If I ever include a romantic subplot in any future movies I will seek immediate outside aid so that dialogue does not devolve into back and forth banter over who loves who more my tragic hero or my female lead."
4. The CGI Lizard: Yeah, I guess the Utapauan (Utapauese? Utapauish?) riding lizard was a neat concept and all, but it was annoyingly fake to look at and downright painful to listen to after more than a minute. In fact, ignore the first part of this complaint...the CGI was handled as well as could be expected...but that damn yipping. Lizards don't yip.
5. "She was... very beautiful. Kind, but sad." : The name of the game is continuity. Specifically, Leia tells Luke in Return of the Jedi that she remembers her real mother. This is accented even more in the official novelization of Episode VI, where Leia actually has brief memory flashes of her mothers' attempts at escape from the Empire. But here, Padme dies mere minutes after the Jedi twins are born. With all the crying and the sudden death, I'm surprised Leia has a chance to even remember her mother's eyes. Oh, and why doesn't Darth Vader recognize either C-3PO or R2-D2? I guess they never really share much screentime, but if they did I think it would be amusing if James Earl Jones asked 3PO if he remembered anything about being built in Mos Espa.
6. Jar-Jar...lives?: Damnit Lucas...we had a deal. You insert the cute, vaguely racist CGI character in Episode I and we accept it as long as he DIES in Episode III. You killed off Mace Windu. You killed off Kit Fisto. You killed off everybody else! But Jar-Jar...lives?!? This deal keeps getting worse all the time.
7. Where's Qui-Gonn?: At the end of the film, the Emperor's taken over and the two surviving Jedi, Obi-Wan and Yoda, are talking about what's going to happen next. And Yoda surprises everyone by telling them how a former colleague has discovered how to become one with the force. Obi-Wan realizes that he is talking about his old master, Qui-Gon Jinn...and that's it. Now if I were running this show, I think that would be a good time for a glowing blue Qui-Gon to show up and provide some sage advice. Wouldn't that be nice? It would tie together this trilogy, provide a little impetus for Obi-Wan t
8. Mon Mothma: M.I.A. : I've now checked this on IMDB, Wikipedia, and every other reliable movie website I know. Mon Mothma, leader of the resistance (did you know she was married? I didn't...), was supposed to make an appearance in this film. Now maybe I blinked, but Genevieve O'Reilly was nowhere to be seen in this film. Nor was the Rebel Alliance outside of Bail Organa. This should have been dealt with.
9. Sifo-dyas...who the hell was he?: Having not read the novels that Lucas and his cronies published covering the time between the films, I may be at somewhat of a disadvantage here. But one thing that was never made clear to me was exactly what the deal was with Jedi master Sifo-Dyas...the guy who ordered the clone army, and how he fit into the Emperor's plans. Also did we ever get true confirmation that the Emperor was named Darth Sidious? Did he once say "My Sith name is Darth Sidious?" Clearly we know it as an audience....but how did Yoda figure it out? I guess he's just that good.
10. This is the end: And yet there are so many questions left unanswered. What is Yoda's species? Was Captain Antilles in this movie related to Wedge? Who is this Tarkin guy and why did the Emperor put him in charge of the Death Star project? These are silly questions to be sure, but there are no more films to tell them in, barring extended footage. I don' tknow...I guess it's just a feeling of letdown from seeing the end of the saga, but all the same, I would gladly have sacrificed a scene or two of pointless romantic dialogue for more nods to the fanbase answering questions like these. But what do I know? For better and for worse, I'm not George Lucas.
Anyhow, my misgivings with the film aside, I got my comeuppance for attending a midnight screening two days later when I slept through all alarms and woke up at 8 AM. Normally I am at school by 7, so this was not a good thing--for the first time in 2 years, I was seriously late for school. In the end I only really missed advisory and the day went reasonably well despite my not having lunch. But all the same, the Sith got their revenge on me and that is why I am going to cut this post short now, gentle readers, so that I may get to bed and avoid repeating my past mistake.
May the Force be you...always.
