Sunday, February 29, 2004
"If you french fry when you should pizza, you're gonna have a bad time."
Yep. After a self-imposed prohibition lasting more than a decade, I finally decided to take the plunge in both a literal and figurative sense and signed up with some other Underwood High School staff members for a ski trip. My first attempt at downhill skiing and the first time I had ever put skis of any sort on my feet since an elementary school cross country ski trip in 4th grade. For better or for worse, I was the only first-time skiier in the group, so while everyone else to their black diamonds, blue squares, or purple horseshoes, I got to spend my day on the training slope practicing important skills. Like turning. And stopping! (Never quite mastered the latter...but I definitely improved) In many ways, the experience was similar to riding a bicycle for the first time. The more you practice the better you become, but the first few runs are somewhat intimidating. If not for the fact that one of my teacher colleagues was also a top rated ski instructor, I doubt I would have mustered the courage after my painful first "attempt" to improve my skills to the point that I did. All in all a good time, despite sun/windburns on my face and scalp and more sore muscle groups than I ever knew existed. Perhaps next time I'll even go on a different hill.
Postscript: For those who are curious, the title of this entry is a quote from a memorable episode of South Park where the main characters travel to Aspen for a ski vacation. I actually said it, with a completely straight face, to a 4 year old girl whose mother was having trouble explaining how to make it safely down the slope.
Yep. After a self-imposed prohibition lasting more than a decade, I finally decided to take the plunge in both a literal and figurative sense and signed up with some other Underwood High School staff members for a ski trip. My first attempt at downhill skiing and the first time I had ever put skis of any sort on my feet since an elementary school cross country ski trip in 4th grade. For better or for worse, I was the only first-time skiier in the group, so while everyone else to their black diamonds, blue squares, or purple horseshoes, I got to spend my day on the training slope practicing important skills. Like turning. And stopping! (Never quite mastered the latter...but I definitely improved) In many ways, the experience was similar to riding a bicycle for the first time. The more you practice the better you become, but the first few runs are somewhat intimidating. If not for the fact that one of my teacher colleagues was also a top rated ski instructor, I doubt I would have mustered the courage after my painful first "attempt" to improve my skills to the point that I did. All in all a good time, despite sun/windburns on my face and scalp and more sore muscle groups than I ever knew existed. Perhaps next time I'll even go on a different hill.
Postscript: For those who are curious, the title of this entry is a quote from a memorable episode of South Park where the main characters travel to Aspen for a ski vacation. I actually said it, with a completely straight face, to a 4 year old girl whose mother was having trouble explaining how to make it safely down the slope.
Wednesday, February 25, 2004
Twin Portraits of Despair
1. Grim Silence: This morning when I walked up the stairs of Underwood High, I noticed a remarkable sight on the corner of a nearby intersection. Given this district's relatively sordid past history, a news truck is never a welcome sign. But there it was, large as life and twice as natural, perched on the corner with its antenna extended skyward. I had no idea why it was there, and the next time I had a chance to look out the window, it was gone. Only later in the afternoon did I discover that there had been a shooting near the school. Apparently a former student had returned to Underwood, fired a few shots near the building, and threatened school police outside the school with his gun. This was not his first incident...apparently an off duty police officer suffered a heart attack trying to restrain him during one particularly violent outburst. What remains interesting to me is that officially no one in the school mentioned the issue. Not once! Which leads me to wonder if there will be any mention of the subject at professional development on Friday.
2. Cutting Words: If the news of a shooting was not sad enough, I had a chance to see a former student today. Way back before I had started this blog, this student was number 34 (of a district mandated 33). She had once refused to return a quiz saying that it was hers and that I "wasn't fucking teaching anything." Following a detention where I attempted to reach out, offer individual tutoring, etc., I dismissed #34 and arranged to have her transferred to another class. Since she had not chosen to take physics in the first place, it seemed a mutually beneficial arrangement. Imagine my surpise then when it turned out she was enrolled to take Physics 2 this semester with my colleague, the head of the science department. (Complicated story behind that...apparently it's an elective and students just decide to take electives, not specific subjects.) Anyhow, I saw #34 today in the hall talking to a friend and as I walk past she loudly starts commenting about how much she now LOVES physics because the head of the department is great and actually KNOWS HOW TO TEACH. After hearing from one of my freshmen how I had no control of my class, it was like a final twist of the knife for the day. They may not be able to tell a mile from a milligram, but they have a astoundingly keen grasp of social interaction...
1. Grim Silence: This morning when I walked up the stairs of Underwood High, I noticed a remarkable sight on the corner of a nearby intersection. Given this district's relatively sordid past history, a news truck is never a welcome sign. But there it was, large as life and twice as natural, perched on the corner with its antenna extended skyward. I had no idea why it was there, and the next time I had a chance to look out the window, it was gone. Only later in the afternoon did I discover that there had been a shooting near the school. Apparently a former student had returned to Underwood, fired a few shots near the building, and threatened school police outside the school with his gun. This was not his first incident...apparently an off duty police officer suffered a heart attack trying to restrain him during one particularly violent outburst. What remains interesting to me is that officially no one in the school mentioned the issue. Not once! Which leads me to wonder if there will be any mention of the subject at professional development on Friday.
2. Cutting Words: If the news of a shooting was not sad enough, I had a chance to see a former student today. Way back before I had started this blog, this student was number 34 (of a district mandated 33). She had once refused to return a quiz saying that it was hers and that I "wasn't fucking teaching anything." Following a detention where I attempted to reach out, offer individual tutoring, etc., I dismissed #34 and arranged to have her transferred to another class. Since she had not chosen to take physics in the first place, it seemed a mutually beneficial arrangement. Imagine my surpise then when it turned out she was enrolled to take Physics 2 this semester with my colleague, the head of the science department. (Complicated story behind that...apparently it's an elective and students just decide to take electives, not specific subjects.) Anyhow, I saw #34 today in the hall talking to a friend and as I walk past she loudly starts commenting about how much she now LOVES physics because the head of the department is great and actually KNOWS HOW TO TEACH. After hearing from one of my freshmen how I had no control of my class, it was like a final twist of the knife for the day. They may not be able to tell a mile from a milligram, but they have a astoundingly keen grasp of social interaction...
Sunday, February 22, 2004
From the recent homework pile...
It's just a diagnostic...so I should not be upset at my 9th graders' responses on their papers.
But just for the record:
1. The kilogram is not a unit of area or length.
2. The millisecond is not a unit of mass.
3. The square meter is not a unit of time.
and most importantly:
You do not use a clock to measure the volume of an object!!!
ARGH!
Thanks for bearing with me...I just had to get that out of my system.
It's just a diagnostic...so I should not be upset at my 9th graders' responses on their papers.
But just for the record:
1. The kilogram is not a unit of area or length.
2. The millisecond is not a unit of mass.
3. The square meter is not a unit of time.
and most importantly:
You do not use a clock to measure the volume of an object!!!
ARGH!
Thanks for bearing with me...I just had to get that out of my system.
Thursday, February 19, 2004
Do you know what day it is?
During today's notebook check, I was having trouble deciphering the dates on one of my student's assignments. It appeared to be postdated...
"Why does this paper say 10/04?" I asked. "October is a few months from now."
"It's got the right date!" the student, a rather subversive joker with a proclivity for personally insulting his teachers, replied!
"Oh?" I said...
"Yeah...10/04...you know what month it is!"
Once he had revealed the secret of his little calendrical convention, then it was child's play to complete his notebook check. But the student's disrespectful attitude remained. He accused me of trying to "play him" when I attempted to teach him how to properly mark the date on his paper. After all, I told him, what about later in the year when you have a stack of papers with the same date on them, from a variety of different months.
"Won't matter," he would say. "I can keep track." His low score on his notebook check argues otherwise.
He's a fool. I realize that now. At the time...I was just amazed. 10 years of public education and no one taught him how to properly abbreviate the date?
Simply amazing!
During today's notebook check, I was having trouble deciphering the dates on one of my student's assignments. It appeared to be postdated...
"Why does this paper say 10/04?" I asked. "October is a few months from now."
"It's got the right date!" the student, a rather subversive joker with a proclivity for personally insulting his teachers, replied!
"Oh?" I said...
"Yeah...10/04...you know what month it is!"
Once he had revealed the secret of his little calendrical convention, then it was child's play to complete his notebook check. But the student's disrespectful attitude remained. He accused me of trying to "play him" when I attempted to teach him how to properly mark the date on his paper. After all, I told him, what about later in the year when you have a stack of papers with the same date on them, from a variety of different months.
"Won't matter," he would say. "I can keep track." His low score on his notebook check argues otherwise.
He's a fool. I realize that now. At the time...I was just amazed. 10 years of public education and no one taught him how to properly abbreviate the date?
Simply amazing!
Wednesday, February 11, 2004
Some days the only thing
That gets me out the door is the commentator I know will be speaking at 6:45 on NPR. For example, I'm not much of a sports fan. If asked, I can provide a minor array of crucial sports facts. You know...who are the key players on teams I claim to support, the names of stadiums, the fundamental suckiness of the New York Yankees, etc. But more than that? Nope.
Which is why I was so surprised to find how much I enjoy Frank Deford's Wednesday radio commentary. Maybe it's the diverse range of sports covered (I particularly liked a eulogy Mr. Deford wrote for the first woman to swim the English channel.), or perhaps it's each commentary's unique mixture of humor and trivia. Maybe it's mix of sarcasm and idealism that I find appealing. Or maybe...just maybe it's the inherent sense of nostalgia, because he records his comments from WSHU in beautiful Fairfield, CT. (Yet one more thing for Constitution state natives to be proud of!)
Anyhow, as I stare into the depths of another long Wednesday...there is very little pulling me to my car more quickly than my curiosity about the subject of this week's commentary.
So many backlogged tales of the new class.
Maybe this weekend I'll have time to share some of them.
That gets me out the door is the commentator I know will be speaking at 6:45 on NPR. For example, I'm not much of a sports fan. If asked, I can provide a minor array of crucial sports facts. You know...who are the key players on teams I claim to support, the names of stadiums, the fundamental suckiness of the New York Yankees, etc. But more than that? Nope.
Which is why I was so surprised to find how much I enjoy Frank Deford's Wednesday radio commentary. Maybe it's the diverse range of sports covered (I particularly liked a eulogy Mr. Deford wrote for the first woman to swim the English channel.), or perhaps it's each commentary's unique mixture of humor and trivia. Maybe it's mix of sarcasm and idealism that I find appealing. Or maybe...just maybe it's the inherent sense of nostalgia, because he records his comments from WSHU in beautiful Fairfield, CT. (Yet one more thing for Constitution state natives to be proud of!)
Anyhow, as I stare into the depths of another long Wednesday...there is very little pulling me to my car more quickly than my curiosity about the subject of this week's commentary.
So many backlogged tales of the new class.
Maybe this weekend I'll have time to share some of them.
Tuesday, February 03, 2004
Another depressing post about teaching or...
I wish I could say that this post marked the end of any discontent I might have about the teaching profession. Really I do. It would make my life easier and would definitely provide a cheerier tone for this blog. But even if this semester's classes seem better than my last batch on the whole, there are still some stubborn cases. Like the young lady who filled out the entirety of a graphic organizer on what science looks like, sounds like, etc. with "I don't know." and promptly put her head down...just like she did through middle school apparently. Or the young lady who barged out of my classroom without permission with about ten minutes left before the end of the day.
Nope...not going to harp on this stuff.
Instead...the long delayed answers to the movie quote contest from December. The winner, for those who care about such things, was a Scotsman from New Haven. I don't think he got 40 on his own, but if not, he came pretty close! Although, in fairness...he is a film major. They live for this kind of stuff.
Ok...here we go:
1. Gladiator
2. Who Framed Roger Rabbit
3. Citizen Kane
4. Duck Soup
5. The Princess Bride
6. Mystery Science Theater 3000: The Movie
7. The Empire Strikes Back
8. It’s a Wonderful Life
9. Doctor Strangelove
10. Memento
11. The Road to Morocco
12. The Usual Suspects
13. Lawrence of Arabia
14. Being John Malkovich
15. Shrek
16. The Karate Kid
17. American Beauty
18. Raiders of the Lost Ark
19. Star Trek IV: The Voyage Home
20. Stalag 17
21. Mallrats
22. Ghostbusters II
23. The Godfather
24. The Shawshank Redemption
25. Mystery Men
26. A Mighty Wind
27. Ghost Dog: Way of the Samurai
28. Army of Darkness
29. American Psycho
30. Back to the Future: Part II
31. Leon: The Professional
32. Pulp Fiction
33. Maltese Falcon
34. Home Alone
35. The Magnificent Seven
36. Pretty Woman
37. Silence of the Lambs
38. The Third Man
39. In the Heat of the Night
40. Forrest Gump
41. MASH
42. Planet of the Apes
43. The Untouchables
44. Blazing Saddles
45. Toy Story
46. The Matrix Reloaded
47. The Manchurian Candidate
48. The African Queen
49. Radio Days
50. Amadeus
There now...wasn't that better than another pessimistic post about the state of the American education system? I think so. I feel better already!
We'll see if that lasts throughout the day...
I wish I could say that this post marked the end of any discontent I might have about the teaching profession. Really I do. It would make my life easier and would definitely provide a cheerier tone for this blog. But even if this semester's classes seem better than my last batch on the whole, there are still some stubborn cases. Like the young lady who filled out the entirety of a graphic organizer on what science looks like, sounds like, etc. with "I don't know." and promptly put her head down...just like she did through middle school apparently. Or the young lady who barged out of my classroom without permission with about ten minutes left before the end of the day.
Nope...not going to harp on this stuff.
Instead...the long delayed answers to the movie quote contest from December. The winner, for those who care about such things, was a Scotsman from New Haven. I don't think he got 40 on his own, but if not, he came pretty close! Although, in fairness...he is a film major. They live for this kind of stuff.
Ok...here we go:
1. Gladiator
2. Who Framed Roger Rabbit
3. Citizen Kane
4. Duck Soup
5. The Princess Bride
6. Mystery Science Theater 3000: The Movie
7. The Empire Strikes Back
8. It’s a Wonderful Life
9. Doctor Strangelove
10. Memento
11. The Road to Morocco
12. The Usual Suspects
13. Lawrence of Arabia
14. Being John Malkovich
15. Shrek
16. The Karate Kid
17. American Beauty
18. Raiders of the Lost Ark
19. Star Trek IV: The Voyage Home
20. Stalag 17
21. Mallrats
22. Ghostbusters II
23. The Godfather
24. The Shawshank Redemption
25. Mystery Men
26. A Mighty Wind
27. Ghost Dog: Way of the Samurai
28. Army of Darkness
29. American Psycho
30. Back to the Future: Part II
31. Leon: The Professional
32. Pulp Fiction
33. Maltese Falcon
34. Home Alone
35. The Magnificent Seven
36. Pretty Woman
37. Silence of the Lambs
38. The Third Man
39. In the Heat of the Night
40. Forrest Gump
41. MASH
42. Planet of the Apes
43. The Untouchables
44. Blazing Saddles
45. Toy Story
46. The Matrix Reloaded
47. The Manchurian Candidate
48. The African Queen
49. Radio Days
50. Amadeus
There now...wasn't that better than another pessimistic post about the state of the American education system? I think so. I feel better already!
We'll see if that lasts throughout the day...
