Tales of the Invisible Ben

Tomorrow, I return to the classroom.

After more than six years, I will be teaching a course that I designed from scratch. Every reading, every assignment, every aspect of this course is mine. Except the title, which was handed to me from the registrar.


It is simultaneously exciting and nerve-wracking. I requested that the course should meet once a week, with the expectation it would be a seminar. Unfortunately, it has proven quite popular, to the point that there are now thirty students enrolled and another handful on a wait list.

This has encouraged me to pursue some creative pedagogical solutions because a class that size is too big for a seminar-style discussion and too long for me to fill the time with lectures. So for now, the plan is to break them into smaller discussion groups for a portion of the class and lecture for the remainder, barring the occasional technical demonstration, film screening, etc.

One might think that my graduate degree would provide some comfort, but this weekend has felt all too familiar. The lonely weekend filled with lesson planning. The constant checking and rechecking of course materials. The curious combination of stage fright and insomnia. All the signs are in place.

As several people have observed, however, even if these symptoms are familiar, this is a vastly different situation from my days teaching high school. Not only will these kids actually *want* to be in my class, but I am a different person than I was then. While it is still possible--and even likely--that I will make mistakes, they will not be the ones I made before.  And hopefully, in the end, I'll be able to make my teaching experience an enriching one, both for myself and my students.